While my multiple infections haven’t exactly improved, things around me have been changing at a dizzying pace, and all for the better. Thanks to a life-saving intervention of modern medicine and M$’s Insurance plan (oh, man, I soooooo want to bemoan how much the American health insurance system sucks, but I’m feeling better than I have in a week so I don’t want to spoil my grateful mood) and a plethora of people who love me, I’m happy to report that I’m not dead! Yay!
Here’s how things have gone from FAIL to WIN for me in three easy steps (please note that the total length of this entry is absurd–feel free to skip down to the summary paragraph if you’ve not the time or the incentive to read all of this):
Step I: Luck out Concerning Your Insurance Plan
Though I didn’t think it was possible, on Thursday, the Soul-Rending Heachache of Doom worsened. This was no mere migraine–it had lasted far too long and was far too painful. I was ready to drive stakes in my eyes from the agony… or at the very least, catch a bus to head to the useless ER again (Aaron was at work). As I knew the journey might involve my passing out, I browsed the M$ insurance website to see if they would cover an ER somewhat closer to us (they do… OMFG, they cover everything). Luckily, I noticed a small number at the bottom of the page: a 24-hour “Health Questions” help line, which claimed to be staffed by registered nurses. I decided it was worth a shot.
The woman on the other end was ridiculously efficient. She confirmed my addresss and phone number, took a full and detailed account of my symptoms, looked up my recent medical history (at least in WA state) electronically and read it back to me, and THEN laid down the awesome: “Okay, this sounds like a genuine emergency. I’m sending a physician from our Mobile Health Unit directly to your apartment.”
Me: “Wait, what? You’re doing what now?”
Her: “You did say you were on your way to the ER, right?”
Me: “Well, yes. But shouldn’t you be recommending that I, um, go there, or something?”
Her: “Oh, no, no no no. From what it sounds like, it would be better if I sent a doctor to your house. They should be there in about an hour. Is that okay?”
Me: “Buh buh buh…”
Shortly after that, a tall, slender woman toting a bag that had to be heavier than she was knocked on my door. Like the nurse, she double-checked my symptoms and pretty much gave me a full physical on my living room couch. Overall, she was approachable, professional, insanely educated, and extremely concerned for my health and the health of Nolan. She double-checked me for preeclampsia symptoms (which I thankfully do not have), screened my headaches, and settled on a final diagnosis of a severe, antibiotic-resistant frontal sinus infection (In your face, ER! I knew this wasn’t a migraine! Pffft, giving me Tylenol… What were they thinking?).
I’m now taking 4000mg per day of Augmentin, a fairly mild mix of penicillan and amoxicillan, and find that life has much improved. Apparently, the reason I’ve been so dizzy and stuffed up was due to the fact that my ears were completely occluded with wax build up. Ewww. When she asked why I didn’t get my symptoms treated earlier, I told her my story of bouncing back and forth between ERs for the past two weeks.
[My mother later pointed out that it was a good thing that we identified the final infection, because there was a huge possibility that it could have entered my bloodstream and gone septic since I've had it for so long, and there wouldn't have been -anything- that anyone could have done for me then. So the whole bit about me being happy to report that I'm not dead? ... Yeah, I kind of wasn't kidding about that.]
Anyway, the doctor referred me to a physician nearby and told me to follow up with an MRI if my symptoms don’t start improving in two days (which they have, thankfully). She also said she’d make sure my OB has a copy of all the information from the various care centers. Awesome.
After that, we just… chatted. We chatted about how the MHU actually saves M$ insurance a million dollars per year, we chatted about Aaron, we chatted about how she spent the last four years of her life in Papau, New Guinea treating some of the poorest people in the world. She gave me a plethora of information, both oral and written, about how to maintain my health in the future, including approximations for cancer screening and how to avoid getting sunburned (lol). It lasted an hour and was, quite honestly, the best doctor’s visit I’ve ever had in my life. I’ve had some fairly… “traumatizing” isn’t the right word, but they were pretty scarring experiences, you know? Leads into that whole “not getting help when I need it so things get really bad really quickly” thing I have going on.
Step II: Let Loose the Ladies
Aside from recieving touching notes and calls from friends, Aaron and were also the recipients of no less than a week and a half’s worth of cooked meals yesterday. The Church Ladies (capitalized because though there are only a few of them, they are a force to be reckoned with) collectively realized they hadn’t seen either of us for an entire week and started sniffing around. On Friday, B, the alpha female, nailed down -exactly- how sick I was (“what!? you’re not able to cook right now? what have you been eating!?”) and whipped the rest into action. We’ve since been innudated with calls, brief visits, and food… Oh, heavens, the food!
Huge servings of tortelini, Mexican casserole, chili-soup, chicken and rice (x2!)… And those are just the main courses. We don’t even have enough room in our cabinets for all of the cornbread, muffins, banana bread, cookies and other side dishes (some of which involve vegetables) that we’ve been getting over the past two days. It’s insane.
I was once told by my father (a man who spent three years of his life traveling the Bible Belt and residing at a different Church Lady’s home each week) never to resist Church Ladies when they set out to do something, especially when it’s something that benefits you. “They’re a flood, Cassandra. A flood of good cooks who are generous with their abilities, their time, and their good fortune,” he said. “Besides, any excuse to throw a party is a good excuse to them!” The context of these statements involved my being uncomfortable with the Church Ladies of AZ giving Aaron and I an impromptu wedding reception. Since I had canceled the wedding, I felt guilty having them put such effort into it. It turned out to be an absolute blast–apparently they had as much fun putting it together as our guests had attending, and the results were beautiful.
To make a long story even longer, I’ve always felt uncomfortable accepting the generosity of others (which came to a head in my freshman year of college when I whittled away for three months because I was too proud to ask my friends for a meal once in a while). I’m stupid and stubborn that way. But since I’m actually too weak to make myself a sandwich and they really are good cooks, I think I’ll try and be more gracious rather than getting my knickers in a knot. (This goes double for April 20th, when the Church Ladies are planning to throw Aaron and I a baby shower. Eep! I didn’t even expect to have one of those! Holy crap!)
Step III: Marry Someone Awesome
Not to be outdone by his elders, Aaron has also been waiting on me hand and foot, as well as keeping up with the housework when he’s been home. This weekend he scoured the kitchen from top to bottom, which included jerry-rigging the screwed up burner on my stove to a level approaching “safe for future use.” He cleaned out my ears using a delicate combination of Q-tips and hydrogen peroxide, which relieved the pressure on my head immensely. He also washed my blanket, filed our taxes, gave me a back rub, and kept me entertained and hydrated while I was awake today.
But, the second sweetest thing he did (first was cleaning out my ears–that’s gross, y’know?) has to be this: after taking out the trash this morning, he led me into the living room and said, “I have a surprise for you!” He reached to open the blinds and before I could hiss at him for letting in the accursed light, I saw this:
Hee. Since it seems I’m the only one in WA that seems to like snow, it feels like he did it just for me. 
In summary, the Soul-Rending Heachache of Doom has now tapered down to a Minor Pain of Mnd-Crushing +3. The pink eye has also drastically improved, and while I’m still fairly weak, I’m now able to stay awake for a whole day! (Yay!) I have an appointment with my (first ever! whoo!) primary care physician on Monday to follow up on the sinusitis and an ultrasound scheduled this Wednesday to check on Nolan. I’ve been amazed at the depths of my friends’ love for me again and again. Aaron kicks all sorts of booty.
Despite the pain and the fever chills, life’s returning to better-than-normal.
